Let's stop this nonsense, it will only make you sad!

his is a solemn and humble call to all the non-converted, the hordes of non-believers, the hard-minded whom can really appreciate the true beauty of ever-changing world. Listening to tree-huggers who would like us to give up our traditional way of life acquired in the decades following the second Great War. I tell you all, let go of your assumptions, keep your oil-burning cars and fart freely.

You may or may not have heard of global warming. You may or may not have thought about it or about anything else as a matter of fact. You may or may not have changed some of your ways to sleep better at night. Well, let me tell you my loving child, deception is your only reward. I confess I have been the first one to fall dupe to this new way of life, clean, lean and mean. I gave up my car, recycled, cycled and froze my ass off twice or thrice. Worst, I told others salvation was at hand if they adopted new habits, shed their prohibitions and let love fill their heart. Well, today came as a shock for me and my few followers as I witnessed through the blur of my own tears, Tony Blair having to apologize to its nation of tea drinkers, pub hopers and mad cow eaters. Indeed, it seems that in spite of many efforts, Great-Britain will miss its own greenhouse gas emission target. Let's briefly recall that the great people of Britain, the Britainers, suggested at the official opening of the new millenium that they were better then the others. They could decrease their green-house emissions by more and faster than others. That, one day they could be seen, perhaps, as the pionneers who saved the species. They let themselves to believe that through progressive green taxes, increased efficiency and by letting go of all earthly luxuries, including the high nose and plum pudding, they could indeed be the greenest of the greens. Well, they are not. They will not reach their self-imposed target of 20% reduction compared to 1990's emission by 2010, a whole two years before Kyoto's deadline of 2012. In fact, they think they'll be lucky as hell if they can reach the -18% mark by that date. Well, I can hear you, greenies. You'll be quick pointing out that they will still reach their target of -12.5% imposed by the Kyoto accord and this would already be twice the reduction that Canada needs to reach their own target. But think about the utter deception.

Indeed, a deep feeling of failure can be read on everybody's faces today while they swear they will never again be so naive as to believe the promises of politicians. So let this be a lesson to you, , Canadian polluters. Don't let anyone tell you salvation is yours my reconnecting with your roots or by giving meaning to your worthless polluting life. Let go now before you loose everything: your economy, your cars, your all-year-long bananas and then, last but not least, your Canadian pride. You will only fully understand what I mean when you'll see your sweet ass farting sadly into a catalitic converter, unable to look at yourself in the mirror.

Writing from Great Britain,
Nic pour pasdequartier.net